You reread an email several times before sending it. You hesitate to speak when you have something useful to contribute. You attribute a successful outcome to luck without recognizing the judgment or effort you brought to it.
These moments invite a question: Is your hesitation pointing to something you need to learn, or to a message you have absorbed about whether you belong?
Examine the Message
Self-doubt can reflect more than a person’s assessment of their skills. Experiences of exclusion, repeated pressure to prove yourself, and expectations about whose voice carries authority can influence how you participate.
For some women, including women of color, those messages may come from workplace experiences as well as family or community expectations. Understanding your own experience helps you identify which beliefs deserve to be questioned.
Separate Doubt from a Development Need
When you hear “I don’t belong here,” pause before treating it as a conclusion. Review the responsibilities you have fulfilled, the feedback you have received, and the skills the situation requires.
If you find a gap, identify the preparation or support needed. If the evidence supports your readiness, consider what is making it difficult to trust that evidence. More work is not always the answer.
Reclaim Your Voice
In my book, Unstoppable Confidence – The Fearless Woman’s Blueprint, I describe my own experience:
“I had the credentials, the experience, the respect. But imposter syndrome didn’t care. It wasn’t after my résumé—it was after my identity. The moment I stopped trying to prove my worth and started reclaiming my voice, I realized: I was never the imposter. The doubt was.”
For me, that shift meant recognizing my experience and choosing to contribute without continually seeking permission to have a perspective. Your next step may be sharing a recommendation, asking a direct question, or acknowledging your role in a result.
A Reflection to Put into Practice
Write down one message that causes you to hesitate. Where did you learn it? What evidence supports or challenges it? Then choose one action that reflects your capabilities and the preparation you have done.
For a faith-centered opportunity to examine self-doubt and connect leadership with purpose, explore the one-day CALLED TO LEAD workshop within the WiL Suite.